


Held Back

by Calla_Lilalma



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Agent!Mibuchi, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Akashi Seijuurou/Mibuchi Reo, F/M, Friendship, I still haven't seen last game so that's out, I'm sorry!, In a beautiful world where homophobia doesn't exist!, M/M, Model/Actor!Kise, On Hiatus, Original Supporting characters - Freeform, There we go!, Typical rich tycoon!Akashi, We don't want spoilers that early, Will add more tags as I go, after canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-28
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-12 09:04:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10487187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Calla_Lilalma/pseuds/Calla_Lilalma
Summary: Kise Ryouta, renowned model and actor, collapses in the set of one of his photoshoots.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hei-llo readers! How are you?? I hope you're doing fantastically!  
> Me? Eh... the usual being a piece of shit!  
> I was thinking at 10pm in the afternoon... should i do something productive and study a bit, possibly saving myself from a mental breakdown at exams season OR being a non-functioning member of society and write a new fic!  
> I wonder what was the vendict. 
> 
> *sigh* Anyway! I fell inlove writing Kikasa and this came out! i had this idea for a while, probably at the same time as 'it's fucking on'.  
> It's completely different from 'it's fucking on' of course! It has THE ANGST TAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 'dun dun duuuun'
> 
> Yeah... so it's 3am in the morning and i didn't edit this, so it's bound to have mistakes! this chapter is straight from the oven!  
> Enjoy the read!  
> And please read the end note on this! It's important!

It finally happens on the warmest day of July.

Ryouta is already feeling sluggish from the moment he woke up, but he thinks nothing of it. He doesn’t want to.

He had a job to do and he would do it, everything being damned.

He takes longer in the shower, the freezing cold water waking him up, exactly what he needs. He doesn’t bother to prepare breakfast, he's stopped wanting to be in a kitchen for a while.

The driver is in front of his apartment building at 9am sharp, as expected. He promptly went down and put on his sunglasses, not to raise any questions.

The drive was long and tedious with indifferent silence until he finally arrives at his worksite, a small, beautiful beach outside the city. It was empty of tourists, probably rented out for the day but the crew members were more than enough to make it seem crowded.

But he doesn’t pay attention to the beautiful natural site in front of him and head to the dressing room, trying to calm his stinging eyes.

The moment he enters the makeup crew’s vision, he is dragged in a chair, at the mercy of the professionals.

“Oh my gosh, Ryou-chan, you look horrible!” one of the artists exclaims.

He plasters a smile on his face, “Waking up so early is not my forte, you know that!” he fake yawns, “But, it’s nothing that someone as talented as you can’t fix, right?” he winks at her, causing her to blush and start working on him with vigor. Feeling the brushes and pencils and such on his face feels comforting, like he has support in pretending.

“Good morning everyone!” Mibuchi Reo announces to everyone in a chirpy but genuine  voice, “Now that all of us are here, let’s do our best for this photoshoot, okay? I want those pictures to be stunning!”  he blows a kiss to everyone and disappears to fix something somewhere.

Ryouta chuckles warmly, earning a weak slap on the shoulder by his hairstylist. He pouts a sorry and stays still.

After a little over an hour, he steps on the sandy beach with nothing but his assigned designer swim trunks that fit him snuggly over his hips and butt. The makeup didn't only get on his face, but his body also, to give it a more flawless appeal, by shadowing his abdomen and chest.

“Good morning Ryo-chan.” Mibuchi’s voice is gentler and lower when he appears next to him.

“Good morning Reo-nee! You’re running around a lot, huh?” he asks with a soft smile.

The other male beams, “Of course, it’s part of the job after all!” he takes a few steps away and asseses Ryouta, who tries his best not to squirm under that scrutiny.

“Have you lost weight, Ryouta?” it’s never a good sign if Reo drops the honorifics.

Ryouta waves him off “It’s the makeup, silly!” he laughs. And heads in front of the cameras, leaving the other behind.

His modelling partner, a sweet girl going with the name Karmen, is waiting for him with a bright smile, wearing a bikini that matches his attire. They have worked together before, so it’s easy to smile and be friendly.

Everyone gets into positions and he turns the professional switch on. He listens to the photographer’s instructions, moves his body in sync with Karmen’s while mustering the expressions that they want to see on him. His coy smile and captivating cat like eyes give them what they want and more.

The sun is scorching hot above all their heads and he can feel it warming the back of his head but he ignores it for now.

The photoshoot takes longer than he expected and unlike he’d like to think, he can’t put on a smile and pretend for too long. The sun becomes a constant pain in his ass, or in this case his head , but he’s sure that they will be done in this location and then he could maybe have a break.

But his head doesn’t stop throbbing, his eyes are stinging and his throat feels as dry as a desert. He tries to breathe deeply but without alerting the other’s about a possible problem. But he feels tired.

So, so tired.

He wants to go back to his bed and be alone.

He doesn’t want to pretend anymore, no matter how much he loves his job.

His body moves on its own, years and years of experience has made it too accustomed to the job. The voices get louder and louder and he can feel a soft, small hand, maybe Karmen’s,  gripping his bicep in gentle and supporting way. Her soft voice tries to reach to his brain but the throbbing doesn’t stop, the feeling of tiredness doesn’t stop.

A single digit number of shots before the possible break he desperately struggled for, Kise Ryouta collapses face first into the hot sand.

~~

His eyes don’t want to open, his mind wants to continue sleeping for a long time.

But the blinding lights right fucking above him can’t do him that favor.

He sluggishly opens them and blinks once every second to adjust in the lights.

His first thought is that his head doesn’t hurt as much as before.

His second thought is that he left the blinds too open last night.

His third thought is that the beeping that sounds close to him are ticking him of, he tries to extend his hand to turn off his alarm.

It is when it's pulled by something the moment he realizes that he might not be in this apartment anymore.

He wills his eyes to focus on their surroundings, seeing the completely white and empty room. No difference with his apartment's bedroom.

He sees the source of the constant beeping and is taken aback by the huge machine by the side of the bed.

So, this is not in his apartment, after all. It is one of the luxurious private rooms in a hospital.

He sighs pitifully and sinks in the mattress.

“So you’re finally awake.” A voice echoes from near him.

Ryouta turns to it and sees Akashi  leaning in the balcony's doorframe, suit jacket off and grey dress shirt messily rolled up on his elbows, smoking a cigarette and exhaling the smoke in the open air outside the room.

“You are in a hospital, Akashicchi.” Ryouta’s voice is dry as he tries to croak out the words.

“Out of the two of us, you’re the one that needs to know that.” Akashi retorts, with no intention of putting out the cigarette.

“Reo-nee will be pissed if he sees you.” He chuckles.

“If,” the other repeats with emphasis, “It won’t hurt him if he doesn’t know.”

“Who knew that Akashi Seijuurou stress smokes?” he chuckles mostly to himself.

Akashi shrugs elegantly, “Only when there isn’t another player for a shogi game, and playing with myself gets boring quickly.” He puts out the butt of the cigarette in a way that no one can that there ever was one.  He even starts chewing a mint gum.

“Speaking of stress, do you know why are you here, Ryouta?” he takes a seat close to him, crossing his legs.

He averts his eyes to the white sheets that cover his mostly bare legs.

Akashi doesn’t need an answer anyway, “You fainted, during your latest photoshoot. It was caused by the heat but the doctor said that malnutrition and alcohol consumption are also key factors.”  

Ryouta is sure that he looks like a kid being scolded, but all the could whisper out is “It was Friday the day before the shoot.” Before a broken sobs manages to escape his tightened lips.

He takes deep breaths,  trying to get everything back in. He blinks the few traitorous tears that well up in his eyes and when feeling he’s in control again, he looks back at Akashi.

His red eyes have softened considerably, full with concern under their austere front. He sighs and runs a hand though his now disheveled hair. It guiltily warms up Ryouta’s heart that his former captain for so many years still trusts him in a mutual way that Ryouta does, that he isn’t afraid to not be perfect in front of him. To not be the leader of so many companies, including Ryouta’s entertainment agency. He’s still rigid, it is part of his nature after all, but he shows that he cares by being here now. That he stayed, along with his husband, Reo.

“It’s been over a year, Ryouta.” He tells him and fuck if Ryouta doesn’t know it. Sometimes it feels like the time passes in the speed of light and other times, like it crawls torturously slow.

He nods and his fist clench in the sheets.

“I know that you’re not an alcoholic Ryouta, don’t worry about that. The doctors said that the amount they found in your blood didn't indicate as such. But, combined with the malnutrition, it’s gotten you here.” he trails off, “Fron now on, I won’t let you get any worse than this.”

He doesn’t have the time to answer before Reo bursts in the room, a large paper bag in hand.

His eyes zero on Kise and he can see the seething anger boiling in them. He smiles as sheepishly as he can, which only serves to anger the other even more.

“You!” he uncharacteristically points at Kise with his free hand, “How dare you take so many years out of my soul you that stunt of yours?! Do you know how worried I was?! We all were?! Poor Karmen-chan started crying because of you, you stupid punk!”

While still talking, he approaches Kise and started shaking him.

“Reo, he just woke up. Be easy on him.” Akashi tries to calm him down in a soothing voice.

Reo sighs and goes to peck his husbands lips a couple of times.

Ryouta pretends to gag.

“Oh shut it. I’m not finished with you yet.”  Reo fumes, making Akashi chuckle. Reo turns to him next.

“You too, mister!” he points at Akashi, “I can’t believe you didn’t wake me up when you came by this morning!”

“You’ve been staying here for three days straight, Reo while still going to work. You needed rest.” Akashi says in the ‘i-am-the-emperor’ voice, making Reo huff stubbornly.

“The doctor said they’ll have to keep you here for a few days to make some final tests and be sure that you’re healthier than before.” Akashi glares at Kise.

“What about the photoshoot?” he asks dumbly.

Reo rolls his eyes, rummaging through the bag he brought in, “It’s cancelled of course! We can’t have you working in such condition! We’ll send another model in your stead.”

“I’m fi-”

“If that sentence isn’t ‘I’m finished with that shoot, good call Reo-nee’ I’m going to make sure you have bodyguards watching you even when you sleep, so you don’t do something stupid!” Reo smiled what seemed to be a calm smile, but the other two males in the room know well that it just as absolute as Akashi.

Ryouta nods frantically.

“Good, now get comfy, because I’m going to take care of you for the rest of your days here”

~~

And 'take care' is exactly what he does.

Reo took the days off to come to the hospital and take care of Ryouta, leaving the work to his trusted assistants. He made sure Ryouta was fed, rested and comfortable. He also made sure he didn’t get killed when he was showering in the rooms private bathroom, something that almost happened twice.

“You haven’t touched your phone yet.” Reo-nee told him while they were eating homemade onion grating soup straight from the Akashi family's private chef.

Ryouta looks at the device at the nightstand, next to his bed and shrugged, despite feeling a knot forming in his stomach.

“Is the accident on the news, or something?”

“Not in the mass media at least, we made sure of that. But nothing can be kept secret for so long.”

After the meal, Reo leaves him alone to make some calls. With a deep breath, he picks up the device and goes to his voicemails.

There were six messages. Two from each of his sister, reprimanding him and scolding him, one of his parents doing the exact same. He calls them briefly and reassures them that he has people with him who he can rely on. They sound apprehensive but he tells them that he’ll tell Reo to call them too. The phone calls thankfully last a minute each.

The other messages are from unknown numbers, but he has the feeling who they might be.

He taps on the first.

 _‘Kise-kun, it’s Momoi, I called to—’_ he deletes it, not caring about the rest of the message.

He taps on the second.

 _‘Hey, Kise, it’s Kag—’_ he does the same with that too.

 Tapping on the last one, the only one of them that has a contact entry above it.

_‘Kise-chin, get well soon. Eat a lot. Bye.’_

That one actually makes him smile. Despite the shortness of it, he’s sure Murasakibara meant the best, he’s just awkward like that.

He’s contemplating on calling him back but he doesn’t in the end. Murasakibara is married to Himuro and even though both of them are still relatively trustworthy to him, it’s still too risky to contact them.

Besides, he isn’t ready yet.

He isn’t sure he’ll ever be ready.

So, he settles on leaving the device back where it was and fakes a smile at Reo when he comes back.

He wants to believe that he’s convincing, but even if he wasn’t, Reo says nothing.

~~

He’s finally released a week later and if the ground wasn’t so dirty, he’d kiss it. The three of them return to his apartment and when he unlocks the front door, he notices that it's even more bleak that the hospital room.

The first thing Akashi does is getting rid of all the alcohol in the place. There was not much anyway, just a couple of bottles, gifts from pleased clients.

Reo does the exact same thing he did on the hospital, now even sitting next to him while working. Akashi too has joined this particular routine and him and Reo stay on his guest room, keeping a strict, almost parenting eye on him.

Ryouta is slowly regaining his colour, eating more and drinking all the mineral water he had on the fridge, but the awful feeling he has when stepping into the kitchen still remains.

At least his friends make it less insufferable. It’s usually Reo that does all the cooking. Akashi is shit in the kitchen, but he stubbornly denies it, saying that ‘he doesn’t want to make them feel bad with his superiority’. Reo and Ryouta both go into hysterics at that.

After another week, Akashi and Reo sit in the living room across from him, like parents ready to tell their kid that they’re getting a divorce.

“Take a year off.” Akashi breaks the silence.

“No.” it’s Ryouta’s immediate response.

“Please, Ryou-chan…” Reo begs, “You’ve been working too much this past year and you just got out of the hospital. All your recovery will be pointless if you go back and do the same.” Reo pleads with him.

“I don’t think it’s necessary.” Ryouta huffs.

“We don’t want you to get worse again.” Akashi says, “sometime off will be good for you and for your career.”

“But a year?”

“Think of it as doing something you could have done… you know, then.” Reo tell him, ending with a weak voice. They all know what he’s talking about.

“Besides, you have violated your contract regarding your free days.” Akashi smirks, “As your employer and a law abiding citizen, it’s my job to assure the best possible health for my employees otherwise it’s an illegal action on my part.” he states.

“Do you really want to risk Sei-chan going to jail? I don’t want my husband to go to jail!” Reo presses kisses on the side of Akashi’s face dramatically. The other doesn't make any motion to stop it.

He really doesn’t have a choice. They are particularly forcing him to take a break. And by the looks on their faces, they already have a plan and have even made the arrangements needed.

He groans as he runs his hands on his face. His friends smirks widen into smiles, fully aware that they’ve already won.

“Fine. I’ll take the year off.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hei everyone! I'm back! and it's not three years later!  
> It's currently 2am in the morning and i have to be up in 4 hours so.... mistakes are bound to happen!  
> I have to stop writing so late!  
> Also, there is a vague sex scene and it's bad ...real bad! but i tried!  
> Enjoy the chapter!

Not even a week later, he’s been dragged to the train station.

Reo and Akashi made sure that he’s in top shape, before he starts his yearlong break, as well as taking care of Ryouta’s pending jobs. He Akashi eventually found out that Ryouta was accepting modelling jobs without telling anybody, slipping them in between bigger ones to go unnoticed. They were small gigs out of the big scale radar he’s mostly working on, but the number of it had sky rocketed during the past year. Reo sat him down and lectured him  about how those jobs were a major reason for his breakdown the other day. He could tell that the other was also getting sick and tired of having the same conversation with him for the nth time in so little time.

Ryouta took all of it without interrupting, as usual, wanting to feel guilty back couldn’t. Working was his method of coping and now that even that is taken away for him for so long, scares him shitless.

He robotically packed some of his clothes, a couple of each kind, along with his beauty products. Under some extra nagging from Akashi about how ‘the weather constantly changes and never be unprepared for anything’ he filled out two heavy suitcases.

The morning of this departure, he’s woken up before the sun even thinks about rising with him, and is taken to the train station. The ride is short, mostly due to the streets being completely devoid of people. 

When he asked where in the hell he’s being sent to, the couple answers him that the found a small town south from here, where no one will bother him. Akashi made legal arrangements, so that no paparazzi and mass media follow him. It’s an impossible task, but he did the best he could so that the townspeople aren’t disturbed as well.

The trains are also starting their first trip, and the fresh brewed coffee in his hands isn’t early enough on waking him up.

“And contact us at least once a week.” Reo tells him as they load their baggage in the train.

“You sound like my mom.” Ryouta sighs tiredly, “Does she even know that you’re trying to wipe me out the face of the earth?”

“Don’t worry,” Akashi reassures him in a groggy voice. He’s also not a morning person, “We contacted your parents before we made the arrangements. They were more than happy to see you finally going on vacation.”

The train was about to leave, so he started heading to his seat, not bothering to take off his sunglasses and hat.

Reo grabbed him by the wrist and turned him around to give him a bone crushing hug.

“Have fun okay?” he mumbles into his ear, “When you get back I want to see you shining, you hear?”  his voice is starting to get watery with each word he utters.

Ryouta smiles and returns the hug, equally tight, “I’m always shining Reo-nee.”

He gets a whack on the back of his head as a response.

He lets go and turns to Akashi, who despite his protests, lets him hug him too. They don’t say anything, he knows that he will always be available is Ryouta needs him.

The train gives a  final warning and he runs inside before he leaves. When it starts to move, he looks out of the window to see the couple still watching him as he leaves. He gives them one final wave, which they return, and slumps into his seat.

 _Well, there is no turning back now,_ he thinks. It’s happening and he can’t do anything about.

It fills him with terror and anticipation at the same time, being away from everything familiar. Or the things that have become too familiar by now.

He sighs deeply and stops bothering for now. He’s had only a couple of hours of sleep and his eyelids feel heavy.

“Que sera, sera…” he mumbles to himself as he falls asleep in his seat.

~~

The conductor has to shake his shoulder hard to wake him up, telling him that they are close to their destination and that he should be ready. He thanks them politely, and looks at his phone where he has a new message. It’s Akashi telling him that there will be someone waiting for him at the station, a middle aged woman with a forest green car.

But as it turns out, it’s not very difficult to find her. She’s the only one in the train station. She waves at him eagerly and kindly.

He takes his luggage and heads out of the train, towards her. Now that he sees her better, she seems like she’s in her late forties to early fifties, with a small and kind looking face and average stature. Her dark brown hair, almost black, have obvious tuff of grey among them, but it doesn’t make her any less beautiful.

“Hello Kise-kun!” she greets him formally and warmly, “I’m Moriyama Emi, you’ll be staying with our family for the rest of your vacation. Did you have a good trip?”

“Yes thank you very much.” He bows stiffly, trying to be polite too, but the grogginess is getting to him.

Moriyama-san  chuckles, “Don’t be so formal, Kise-kun. Akashi-kun told me that you may be nervous when you come here.” she stands on her tip toes to fix his hat and hair.

“Honestly there is no reason to be. Everyone here will welcome you with open arms!”

“Thank you ma’am.” Ryouta replies. He thinks that she might be exaggerating in the wide welcoming in the small town, but he doesn’t comment on it. She opens the trunk of the car and he puts his luggage in, embarrassingly barely fitting and sit in the co-driver’s seat.

The ride is ten to fifteen minute short, the radio plays soft morning music and he looks outside the window. The town is surrounded by greenery, forests on the one side and a few fields that already have workers on them. Moriyama-san presses the honk a few times when they pass them, as if to say ‘good morning’ chuckling when he jumps out of his skin. He can’t get mad at such a lively woman, even as his cranky morning self.

They arrive at a traditional house, not too big but enough for a family of three or four. The garden is beautiful, full of bushes and summer flowers.

“Don’t be shy, come in.” Moriyama-san opens the door for him to take his luggage inside.

He looks at the inside and he’s amazed. It’s been a long time since he entered a household with such a warm and homely atmosphere that it almost makes him nauseous. There are pictures everywhere, a large tv with plenty of furniture, all made of wood to fit the whole aesthetic. There is a staircase that lead to the second floor and there is not an aspect of this house that doesn’t scream ‘happy family’.  

“Let your luggage here and my son will them up for you. Yoshitaka!” she calls loudly from the staircase.

After a few beats, sluggish footsteps echo from the second floor, then proceed to go down the stairs.

“Wha izzit ma?” a young man, probably around Kise’s age, with black hair and similar eyes to Moriyama-san mumbles sleepily with a hint of annoyance.

“Our guest has arrived.” Moriyama-san scold him, “Take his things in the guest room.”

“There is no need, really.” Kise tries to reason with her when the son interrupts him.

“Woah, you’re Kise Ryouta, right?” he asks with a more awake voice. Then he takes a slightly disappointed expression, “Man, I thought there would be some beautiful girl when mom told me about our guest.” He groans and Ryouta’s eyebrow twitch the slightest.

“I’m sorry then.” He speaks with fake politeness and grabs his bags, “Moriyama-san, where is the guest room, I can take them by myself.”

“Second door to the left, Kise-kun.” He passes the son the younger member of the family and heads upstairs.

“Hey, dude, sorry about that…” he opens the guest room door for Kise. “I was being a dick.”

Kise waves dismissively and examines the room. It’s fairly large, with a large closet. The walls are bare but it’s nothing like his apartment in the city.

“Bathroom is next door on the right. Settle down and come for breakfast, you must have woken way too early to be here at this hour.” he leaves the room.

Kise takes only half an hour to put his things in places he can find them and head down the stairs into the living room.

Moriyama-san is in the kitchen and moves the spoon she hold in a motion that tells him to sit. The younger Moriyama is gobbling down on his eggs and he holds back the disgused expression.

A plate and a glass of juice are laid in front of him, “Did you settle down okay?”

“Yes thank you very much Moriyama-san.” she laughs.

“Call me Emi-san, Kise-kun. Now eat up.” He nods and starts slowly eating his food.

“Is there any other people in the house I should know about?” he asks at some point.

“My eldest son is living away from here and me and my husband have gotten a divorce. He  has remarried and lives in another town also.”

“I-I’m sorry…”

“Don’t worry dear, it’s been years since then.”

Ryouta still feels the atmosphere tense around him and quickly thinks about a way to dispel it.

“How did Akashicchi found about this place?”  Emi-san beams at him as she starts explaining.

“Reo-chan actually contacted us. You see, we’re distant relatives from his father’s side and he and Akashi-kun helped us a lot when our house was robbed terribly a few years ago. Imagine what a surprise it get a call saying that he needs a favor from us. Of course we’d help out, right Yoshitaka?”

“Mom’s been waiting for a chance to repay our debt to them.  She almost fought with them, because she didn’t want the payment. Felt like cheating or something.”

“Oh shush you! In the end, we finally accepted…”

“He was right.” Ryouta tells her. “I will be staying with you for so long, it just doesn’t feel right to stay without paying.”

Emi-san huff stubbornly and orders him to finish his food. Both he and Yoshitaka chuckle.

After a satisfying breakfast, Yoshitaka offers him a tour of the town, to learn how to move around the city by himself.

The town is bigger than he imagined. All of the houses are in the same traditional style the Moriyama’s so it had the aura of a small village. But as the tour went on, the roads got more complicated and the things that were provided were more than he imagined, such as lots of cafes and fast food places. They had a school in which almost everyone his age went to, according to Yoshitaka.

Ryouta went into one of the convenience stores and bought a shit ton of hair dyes, all the same common dark brown that wouldn’t make him stand out. Akashi and Reo might have told him that there would be any paparazzi chasing him, but he still wanted walk freely for as long as he stays here. if he gets recognized fine, but the constant attention is exhausting, even for him.

With Emi-san’s help, he applies the dye on and in two hours later, he’s become a brunette with no blonde hair seen in his head.

~~

The first week of his stay is going well. The Moriyama family is great to him and Emi-san doesn’t waste a moment to pamper him, either with her paradisiac food, or with her overly motherly nature. As much as he loves it, there is such warmth about her that he realizes it has been a long time since he’s seen his own family. They are busy with their own lives, his mother a former model and current fashion designer who runs a fashion company brand with his second oldest sister, also a fashion designer and their father as their accountant. His eldest sister is on her long awaited book tour, her second book and is roaming the world. At least he can go on youtube and watch her in her channel, doing all short of things, from life advice, to gaming, to recording her experiences when she goes to volunteer work whenever she feels she’s needed.

The pictures on his phone are two years old, the last time they were all together as a family, happy. The official last time was a year ago, when Ryouta wasn’t answering any phone calls and doorbells and almost disappears from the surface of the earth.

He shakes his head, he doesn’t want to think about the past now.

He calls them once, happy that they actually stop what they were doing instead of rushing the call. He tells them about how things are here, but most of the time he listens about a new theme for a collection or a new found friend on a trip to Brazil; his mother is particulary persistent about him modelling for her when he gets back from his vacation and his eldest sister freaks out when she hears that he dyed his ‘golden mane, why Ryo-chan!!??’. He feels better that night when he goes to sleep.

He practically begged Emi-san to let him do some kind of work, because sitting and being lazy is driving him crazy. He helps in everything except the kitchen, guiltily lying that he sucks at cooking and he’ll end up blowing something up.

Then at a Friday night, Yoshitaka invites him in the next town for a drink.

He thinks about Reo and Akashi, how worried they were when he collapsed and how they trust him to never repeat that again. The purpose of this whole thing was to relax, not feel like shit in a different place.

Yoshitaka is reassuring him that he won’t let him drink more than a glass, he relents and joins him.

The town next to the one he lives is even bigger, like a small city. The night life is equally buzzing, people of all backgrounds go to different destinations, from the fancy restaurant to the few love hotels that exist here.

Yoshitaka tells him that he works in one of the restaurants at day and at night in one of the bars. Tonight he had a night off and decided to take him to see what the night life looks like here.

Then he starts flirting with a girl and ditches him.

Thanks a lot.

At least he got the keys to the car. He can still leave him here and let him crawl home.

But the possibility of seeing Emi-san’s disappointed face keeps him from doing it.

Instead, he orders a drink and looks around. If he can’t drink tonight, he might as well find something else to keep him from leaving. Or someone else.

He takes a sip of his drink and scans the costumers of the place. Many businessmen and businesswomen, trying to relax after a hellish day, some young people, younger than him for sure hitting of each other and laughing too loudly for his tastes.

Then he spots him. By the billiards, alone, also sipping on his drink.

The light about the table gives Ryouta the perfect chance to check out the stranger a few feet away from him. Tall, but not nearly taller than Kise, maybe ten centimeters shorter,  the plain black t-shirt shows his well-defined muscles to the world, with short black hair and breathtaking bright blue eyes that appear to be made of the shiniest of steels. He’s watching the pool table with furrowed bushy eyebrows (that some fucking how make him ten times hotter), and Ryouta is sure that it’s his default expression.

His legs think faster than his brain because in a few long strides he’s in that table, looking at the attractive stranger, who looks back at him with the same expression.

“Can I help you?” he asks, his tone polite, but the tone ‘if-you-fuck-with-me-I’ll-chew-you-out-and spit-you-back’ underling his words.

Ryouta downs the rest of his drink and puts his best seductive look and pose, leaning on the table and cocking his hips. It’s been a while since he flirted but the photographers said that he still can get whoever he wants.

“Sure you can, in a lot of ways…” he purrs out. The guy doesn’t seem impressed.

“You’re ruining my game now.” he deadpans and in no way does he seem seduced in any way.

But Ryouta is looking for a release in this Friday night and is too stubborn to give up.

“On the contrary, I’m making your game so mush better.” He face palms mentally at the lameness of the line.

But it’s worth it, because the guy snorts, his expression softening. He counts it as a small victory.

“Are all your lines that bad?” he muses.

“Possibly, but I’m sure you can find a way to shut me up.”

“I can only think of punching your gorgeous face.” he turns red as soon as he finished the sentence.

Ryouta is never going to admit that his ears and nape heat up as well, “That’s such a mean way to compliment someone Stranger-san. You’re lucky I’m equally bad with flirting.” He beams.

The guy stares at him dead in the eye for a few solid seconds, then his gaze is travelling down to his body. Ryouta stops breathing, whether from the intensity of the gaze or the anticipation of possibly getting laid,  he doesn’t know.

“How do I know you’re not a minor?” he asks and Ryouta is surprised from the question.

“I got drinks from the bar, ask the bartender.” He answers.

He does so and he seems to know the bartender because Stranger-san gets a friendly pat on the shoulder and actually smirks. They must know each other.

Then, he locks eyes with Ryouta and cocks his head to the door.

He exhales. Seems like the night isn’t going to be so boring after all.

~~

“What’s your name?” he asks as they walk to the nearest hotel, not holding hands, nothing. Just walking side by side. The jittery feeling in Ryouta’s belly disappears, he is completely calm.

The stranger doesn’t turn to him as he says his name.

“Yukio. I assume your name isn’t ‘annoying brat’?”

He laughs at that, genuinely. The air around them is like the calm before the storm, but Ryouta doesn’t mind it one bit.

“I’m 26 fyi! And it’s Ryouta.” He answers.

“I’m 28.” Yukio smirks.

“You’re not that much older than me, you meanie!” Yukio laughs at his whining and he feels like they are going on a date, not like they are going to fuck each other’s brains out.

~~

The moment they’re in the hotel room, Ryouta grabs Yukio by the shirt and tries his hardest to shove his tongue down his throat. Yukio seems surprised at first but then takes the control away from him, wrapping an arm around his waist and kissing back with fierceness. Ryouta’s head is spinning by the sheer force and roughness of the kiss. It’s just what he wanted, to forget in the best way possible.

Their clothes are off awfully fast and he lay on the best, still kissing and groping each other like they are still teenagers. Luckily Ryouta has a spare condom on his jean’s pocket, just in case something like this happened.

He’s moaning for Yukio to go faster and harder, to make him blind with pleasure right now.

“Not tonight.” Yukio whispers in his ear. His breath is hot and he nibbles on his earlobe.

“Whaaa....” he drawls out but Yukio is kissing him again.

And it’s fucking gentle.

“Relax.” He tells him, positioning himself between Ryouta’s legs.

Then he proceeds to kiss every part of Ryouta’s body, worshipping it like a lover would. His eyelids, the tip of his nose, everything.

It feels phenomenal.

But it’s not the way he wants it. He wants roughness and fast motions. He wants to bury his face into a pillow and hold back his moans, like he’s used to.

He doesn’t remember how to respond to anything different.

Yet he doesn’t stop Yukio from doing what he wants, because his mind is slowly being taken away from the painful scenes in his mind.

Where Ryouta wants biting, Yukio nibbles softly, not leaving any marks.

Where Ryouta wants to be on his stomach, Yukio has him wrapped around him, Ryouta’s arms around his neck and legs rested on his sides.

He quickly finds most of Ryouta’s sensitive spots, both outside and inside of him. His movements are slow and sensual, like a passionate dance in soft music.

Ryouta dances with him. He can’t help what his body is feeling.

He feels like he’s getting spoiled  by a guy he knows for less than an hour more than he ever did ever since he turned twenty.

He feels his climax coming slowly. The feeling of magma inside his belly is getting stronger and stronger with each sensual thrust. When he comes, it’s like watching the fireworks you’ve been waiting for since the night sky appeared in a festival, not something that catches you by surprise. It’s more amazing than he thought.

He opens his eyes (he didn’t even realized that he’d closed them) and sees Yukio watching him, icy blue eyes making him hotter. His face is flushed and sweaty, even more than when they were at the lobby asking for a room from the clearly teenage girl in the counter.

He feels and sees him shudder and kisses him as he too finds his climax.

He lays next to Ryouta and takes fast breaths.

“If you want round two, you’ll have to fucking wait.” He grumbles and Ryouta laughs.

“I had only one condom, though.”

Yukio weaky flicks his forehead, “Stupid, there are tons of them right fucking next to you. Where do you think I got the lube?”

A devious smirk decorates Ryouta’s lips.

“If you’re so tired,” he takes one of the condoms in the stack, “don’t worry, now I’m going to do all the work.” He straddles Yukio’s thighs, bending to kiss his neck softly.

It’s dangerous, the reasoning within him talks, but he doesn’t listen.

At least for this night, he wants to be treated gently, like he’s being worshipped. There is a momentary confidence that tells him that he deserves it.

~~

He wakes up the next morning in an empty bed and a note. He sleepily unfolds it and reads it.

_I paid for half of the room’s fee._

_Um… thanks for last night._

_Have a good life and get over whatever’s got you down._

_Yukio._

There are multiple scribbles in the note, like he didn’t know what to write. The words that he wrote are stiff. He probably didn’t want to come off as a douche, but Ryouta wouldn’t think so anyway. A guy that fucked him that royally and let Ryouta  also have his way with him wasn’t a douche in his books.

 _get over whatever’s got you down_ one of the lines say. It strikes him more that he’s like. So Yukio knew that something was on his mind, and tried his best to make him forget it in order for both of them to have a good time.

that’s oddly… sweet thing to do for your one night stand. So there are genuinely good people to get lucky with. Ryouta sure did.

He exits the room, pays the same girl his amount of money and goes to find Yoshitaka, who has bombarded his phone with messages and missed calls about where his is. Seems like that girls ditched him and slept in an internet café. Ryouta snorts.

~~

The next of the week went like usual, a routine is starting to form. He considered getting a job to keep busy but Emi-san scolded him for wanting to ruin his vacation, then called Reo and Akashi  to do the same, who in turn called his parents to also scold him.

So getting a job is forbidden and he has seven pairs of eyes watching over him like hawks.

He’s on his way on the grocery store when he hears a crash from near him.

He runs to the site and sees a bicycle crashed in a dumpster and a boy clutching his knee in pain, trying not to cry.

He runs to the kid and crouches in front of him, “On a scale to 1 through 10, how bad does it hurt?” he doesn’t bother asking if he was okay, his knee was bleeding for fuck’s sake.

The boy is startled by his presence, brown eyes staring at him before muttering a ‘nine’

“Will you let me see it?” he asks tentatively and the boy takes his hand away from it.

He winces at the sight, the gash is pretty big and it’s bleeding too much for his liking.

“It’s bad, I’m not gonna lie.” The kid grimaces, “Wait here, I’m going to run to the store and get water and tissues to try and clean it okay. For now don’t touch it.” the boy nods and he takes as a signal to start running like the wind. He takes two bottles of water and a box of juice for the kid and lots of tissues.

He runs back and thankfully finds the kid still here, following his instructions.

“Here.” he hands him the juice, hoping he’ll like it.

“It’ll sting a bit.” He wets the tissue and starts cleaning the wound. The kid flinches and he decides to make a conversation to distract him.

“What’s your name?”

The boy’s voice cracks, just like his did when he reached puberty, “Hiraku, Kasamatsu Hiraku.”

“Nice to meet you Hiraku-kun, my name is Kise Ryouta. I came here for vacation two weeks ago.” Thank god he doesn’t seem to recognize him from television.

“You’re from the city?” the boy’s eyes sparkle as he said that.

“Yes, I am.” He deems the wound pretty clean for now. The boy’s family will take care of the rest when he gets him home.

“Why would you come here? it’s boring.”

He chuckles. “Maybe, but the city can be too noisy at times too. What happened here?”

He boy blushes out of embarrassment focusing on his juice box, “The chain came off my bike while I was pedaling and it got me off balance.”

He wraps the wound in an amateur fashion, it’ll do for now and cleans Hiraku’s hands.

“You live far?”

The boy nods. Ryouta sighs.

“I’ll take you back. Hop on.” he turns his back to the kid, still crouching.

“You sure Kise-san?”

“Yeah! I can take it. I’ll roll your bike too.”

The boy reluctantly climbs on his back. He’s very small comparing to him and he even as a model, he still does a shit ton of workout to stay on shape.

He lifts the bike and starts walking, listening to Hiraku’s instructions to his house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Comments and Kudos are always welcomed! I'm going to sleep now!

**Author's Note:**

> So how was it!? I hope you like it! I'm sooo tired!
> 
> The important disclaimers i want to make are:  
> 1\. slow updates! sorry! even i am not very sure on how this story will go. To explain, I think in scenes that i want to write and now i have some at the beginning, some at the middle and the ending! so the problem is a coherent way to connect them! Also, i'm a slow writer and i really have other staff to attend to (I really have to read Financial Theory and other subjects like that, no matter how slowly it's killing my self esteem!)  
> 2\. Don't mind the number of chapters in the tags! Now it says twenty, but the final number is uncertain! due to the reason above too, i don't know how much this fic will take, but i'm 95% sure that it won't take above 20 chapters!  
> The Number in the tags is for me to stay on track and be more organized! you'll know where it will end ;)  
> Thank you all so much for reading and I'll see you in the next chapter!


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